Mauryn's new game is hiding for peekaboo. She slaps her little hands up over her eyes and she is so excited for us to see her after she has been hiding.

Sarah posted a few days ago about the difference between being and doing. Her post really challenged me and made me think (her posts always do). Do I know who I am? I am defined by the many hats I wear: wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, and teacher. I become so focused on being there for others and having my hats on, that I lose sight of being true to myself. I hold back my feelings, thoughts and opinions so I do not offend, cause conflict, or have people think I am judging them when our opinions may just differ. I hold back because I am fearful of being called on what I believe and not being able to adequately defend myself. I am, in a sense hiding the real me. I do not like conflict so I don't always express myself if I have a different opinion. In doing so I have lost part of who I am. I want to learn to be more confident and comfortable expressing myself. I want to take time to learn who I am - not just being defined by my many hats. I want to take time to do things that I enjoy and not feel guilty for taking focus off of others and putting some of the focus on myself (I saw somewhere that this can help your health!). I want to embrace who I am. I don't want to be worried about what others think of me and be confident in who I am. I want to stop hiding and begin living. I want to feel the excitement and joy, like Mauryn in a game of peekaboo.


Earen said...

I can definitely relate to what you're saying. In fact, I was just mentioning this as I was posting my "taking a stand" blog & the whole day I worried about what other people would think & would they be offended & did I hurt someone....It's hard to confront & sometimes take a stand on things, but I have to always go back to being obedient to what the Lord is calling me to do. It's hard to sometimes let our real selves show & stop hiding...but you can do it! It's who God made you to be!

Sarah Markley said...

Sorry I am a little behind in my blog reading! Of course you can link me, I am honored! Thank you! I love reading your posts, by the way.=)

Denise said...