Heavy Hearted

Yesterday we received news of a friend who had to undergo an emergency c section to deliver her baby. The baby was laying transverese and had no heartbeat. The situation with the baby was dire so the doctors had to make both an incision horizontally and vertically to get the baby out. The doctors worked on the baby for 25 minutes to get her breathing and then they transferred her to the Children's Hopsital. As of now, the baby is on a respirator and is being medicated to keep all her organs functioning. They are running a number of tests to check for the extent of organ function and will advise the family later this weekend on a prognosis. It seems fairly certain that if the baby survives she will have some neurological damage. I am grieving for this family, for this mom who can not hold her newborn baby, a mom who is herself in pain both physically and emotionally, for their 5 other children who are confused and not sure what is happening, and for their family who lives so far away.

At our homeschool group yesterday we were tying blankets to donate to a group called Project Linus. Project Linus gives blankets to children who are in the hospital or children who have suffered the loss of a parent, grandparent, or sibling. As we were tying blankets and the children were praying over the blankets, I couldn't help but think that this moms children could be recieving these blankets. These blankets tied with love and covered in prayer by their friends. These blankets meant to give comfort in a time of loss.

My heart is heavy because I know this feeling of seeing your baby hooked up to monitors and not being able to hold or touch her. You feel so helpless and just heartsick. But my experience does not compare to this mom, my baby was breathing on her own, her organs were functioning, and we knew she was going to be okay. I look at my babies today and I am thankful for them, for their health, for being able to hold them and love on them, and for being granted the gift of being their mom.